Bananapoop ~ The "How to be less stupid" tutorial ~ This is not a banana tree!

Uncommon sense ~ Spirituality ~ God's feelings

I like what the movie Fight club said about it: "God hates you." That sure would explain a lot.

I came up with something amusing in my suicide tutorial, My venting. About being an outcast of society... and thinking that we should die if we're not perfect when we’re probably here to learn:

Even being burn at the stake would have been mercy, at least I wouldn't have to sit on the side and contemplate humanity shit all around the place, on each other and even themselves... and be unable to do a thing about it... and not even be able to be a part of it... Maybe that's how gods feel. I feel like Cassandra in the Greek Mythology, able to see the future but unable to prevent it because no one would ever believe her...

People, you're dumb, but you're on your own, so you might as well make the best of it because no one is coming to save you. There was this Jewish dude who tried once, but after you chose to free a murderer instead, and nailed him to a cross, no one's going to volunteer for the job anymore.

Well, the doors of heaven are open, if you ever feel like sucking god's dick up close. But don't expect to rule in paradise. Someone has to trim the garden, take the pubes and feathers out of the pool for the angels. What, you thought it was there for your benefit? Then why the hell do you think you're down below! You're a cheap reality TV that's what you are. Now go mess up and make a fool of yourself so the immortals can be entertained!!!

Enjoy! Well, at least they will. Dumb ass. Mwahahahaha!

Oh yeah I would so have been burn at the stake for this.

But Satan never burns anyone in hell, and god never burns anyone in paradise, the only people who ever did the burning are the Christians. With their precious "Thou shall not kill". So who's the true demons, hm~ Damn hypocrites. If you're right, then your own god hates you!


This is taken from my Gays are gay page to invalidate the old "Gays are against god's will" as if people knew what he wanted. I'm not gay, I'm asexual (orientation: neither) but I like gay men because they're the only ones not trying to rape me or acting only as a hypocrite plot to fuck me:

Let gays celebrate their love and loyalty!

Even if something against it was written in your holy book, god didn't write that himself, maybe people misunderstood him.

Times change and God can change his mind too. Maybe he wants everyone to be gay so humanity will leave Earth and join him in heaven. But more likely to stop us from destroying his creation, and limit our population so we won't starve, plagues didn't seem to work. *Chuckles*

If he created all things, then he created gays too.

If his will is absolute, then he wants them or they'd be bursting into flames.

If we were created in his image, then maybe God is gay; after all there's no mention of a woman, ever. God, the holy spirit who made his son with the surrogate Mary... the whole holy trinity, they're all males!

But one thing for sure: if he loves all his children, then God loves gays too.


Lisa Of Shades
15 November 2013

God loves everyone, really? What a mean asshole.

I changed my picture in the page Corporations are out to get you and ended up on this site:

God is Not Out to Get You at revandy. Nah, he's patient enough to wait until you die before burning you in hell. The hell that you live, it's mostly self inflicted, or the result of another's free will to hurt you, so defend yourself!

God may love everyone, even his priests who abuse children, but I still think that we should castrate them, and sell the task as a bid on eBay.

Now that sure would make money and would be worth years of therapy.

Why pay for years of jail? Instant rehabilitation. I'm positive that God wants us too, after all his hands are tied with the free will clause, but he made sure that someone invented knives. Too bad there are laws against it, but I'm sure it's not against his commandments.

I want to quote a reply from the site, it's just too perfect and lucid:

Isai Diego:

"I want to believe this, but I can’t. Too many things have gone wrong in a row. How can I turn to god without helping myself? I’ve spent too many days hoping for something good to turn up in my life. So far, nothing. God is the real scheme. I turn to him, and things get worse. It’s wrong to have people falsely believe that he’s going to help. It’s not true. We don’t need him. It just creates a false hope. I want to believe he can help, but too much has gone wrong. Where is he?"

Probably watching little kids get assaulted by his priests.

An asshole like that isn't my god. Or maybe that’s why he gave kids teeth.

Maybe he's preparing a very special place in hell for all the church people who used his name to justify discrimination, abuse and even murder!

"Thou shall not kill"

Well, castration isn't murder. We probably should cut off his hands too just to be sure... and heck off with his head! Better safe than sorry. I can always repent on my death bed.

Criminal: "Oh god I'm so sorry to have hurt so many without giving a shit, even though I was perfectly aware and would do it again if I wasn't about to die..."

God: "Sure my son I love you. Now come suck my balls and bend over!"

Hm, that actually makes sense. I told you he's gay. Oh god that would make him a pedophile too... Now that explains why his priests are so into it...

I am SO for Lucifer, his followers aren't the people who burned innocent women at the stake. That's what "good" and "moral" people do. Not the devil. I'd feel much safer with demons.

At least you know what to expect instead to be nailed by your friends! Jesus is a sucker... and he knew it was coming... he did nothing the wuss. He was probably happy to die, fed up of people complaining and asking him to fix their lives, instead to get a grip and live their own lives... Maybe he even asked Judas to sell him out, to see if people cared for him and wanted to protect him, deserving his love and his father’s... and they preferred to free a freaking murderer... well, that's what you get!

Maybe Jesus and Judas (the names are strangely similar...) were gay lovers and eloped to heaven.

I'm not gay, but that'd be sweet... and would explain why his followers were only men.

The only logical option of a sexist misogynist is to turn gay. Ha! In your faces! Better that than beating your wife. So I don't mind that they're all gays up there. Just shut up about the "god hates gay" especially if you claim that he loves everyone. Make up your freaking mind with consistency! If people discriminating gays are really in god’s image, then god’s an asshole… but since gays were too, then god is gay. I don’t think he likes that your heart is full of hate. Save that for child molesters, such as church people.

If I was god... I'd curse the church down to hell first. I’d fire those damn bad PR, on the grill!

Actually the real name of Jesus would be Joshua, which is beautiful… I’d send us all to hell just for twisting his name into something so ugly!

If god hides among us to trully connect and understand us, living a life of mortal, to judge you after his/her lifetime, and it turns out to be me... oh man... you're so going to be cooked.

If god hides among us to truly connect and understand us, living a life of mortal, to judge you after his/her lifetime, and it turns out to be me... oh man... some people are so going to be cooked. But less trouble to just let them crumble back into dust… I don’t recall a moment where god added a soul to his clay Adam and Eve… It was just mud and breath I think… We’re nothing but dirt for his own amusement.

And what makes a good movie? Drama, lots and lots of drama, either in a romantic comedy or the worst gore horror movie… so next time you wonder “Oh god, why, why me” know that he’s having a great time watching you squirm!


Lisa Of Shades
20 December 2013

We all worship the same god: all creation itself.

I think that the best way to worship god isn’t to give money, prestige and attention to a church; but to respect and preserve his whole creation. Nature and ourselves.

Religion caused horrible wars. But think about it… if there’s only one god, and you worship god, then everyone worship the same with a different name. Even countries are called differently to adjust to the people’s language (Japan is actually Nippon).

So killing each other over a name, especially with the “thou shall not kill” 1rst law… that’s really against your god.

And if people have more than one deity… God has his angels, Zeus had people under him too, and so on.

So we’re arguing about the color of the sky. Calling it blue or bleu (French) is irrelevant. As long as you have air to breathe, you should thank your god.

Stop polluting it all over the place from the biggest enterprise, to the car, to the smallest “cleaning” and “beauty” products.

How do you think god feels to be praised by empty words if you destroy his work after? Not happy. That’s why we get climate cataclysms, from cooking the planet by burning dinosaur farts. (A stupid way to say it, but a very eloquent way to describe how stupid we are.) Actions define you, and they come back to haunt you.


Lisa Of Shades
26 April 2014
Right to be ©razy 2013 and beyond!